I covered essential tips and some logistics in Part One, but I wanted a to write a separate post to address the actual international flight with a toddler. I know it can be incredibly daunting, especially if your kiddo has never flown before!

Whether it’s a quick hop across the pond or a long-haul, round-the-world journey, it’s the fear of the unknown that gets us, I think, and that’s why an international flight with a small person is so anxiety-inducing. My first and most important tip is this: don’t get ahead of yourself with worry. I’ll tell you what you already know: there are many things that can go wrong on an international trip with a kiddo. In fact, there are many things that will go wrong! But the important piece here is that you don’t know which things will go wrong. So it’s not worth the emotional expense to worry about what you can’t even predict. You might spend weeks freaking out about whether your kid will cry the whole flight and then come to find that he or she doesn’t make a peep! So relax. Come as prepared as you can with toys and snacks and the like, but don’t set yourself up for a difficult experience by worrying that it’s going to be terrible.

I truly, truly believe that children feed off of our own energies. Even if your instinct is to worry, the calmer you can be about the flight (and the whole trip really), the better things will go for everyone!

Before the flight

Discuss it with your child ahead of time.

If there’s one thing I’ve learned about toddlers, it’s that they understand wayyy more than we think they do. It’s kind of shocking, really. So no matter your kiddo’s age, I think it’s a great idea to talk about your trip before it happens. Talk about how you’ll ride on a plane (or a bunch of planes, if you have layovers). Talk about what you’ll do on the plane and what you’ll see and how there will be lots and lots of other people. Talk about the airport and what you’ll do there. Describe as much as you can! Toddlers thrive on predictability and are most comfortable when they’re absolutely sure what’s coming next. As much as you can, try to make this happen for your kiddo, and you’ll have smoother sailing. (Well, flying.)

Books are another great way to discuss your upcoming trip. There are tons and tons of books about plane travel! We chose this one, but I think there are better ones out there. Amazon won’t steer you wrong.

Consider the Global Entry program.

Global Entry is the greatest thing ever. It saved us from a VERY long customs line in Dublin, and I don’t know about you, but I can’t think of much that would be worse than trying to wrangle a toddler in very close quarters with a bunch of bags and hundreds of other people moving at a glacial pace for hours on end. Nope, totally worth the little bit of hassle it took to get approved for Global Entry!

From the website:

Global Entry is a U.S. Customs and Border Protection (CBP) program that allows expedited clearance for pre-approved, low-risk travelers upon arrival in the United States. Members enter the United States through automatic kiosks at select airports.

At airports, program members proceed to Global Entry kiosks, present their machine-readable passport or U.S. permanent resident card, place their fingerprints on the scanner for fingerprint verification and complete a customs declaration. The kiosk issues the traveler a transaction receipt and directs the traveler to baggage claim and the exit.

“Expedited clearance” << such beautiful words.

Note that you have to apply for the program, then get a background check done, then wait to be called for an interview, then show up at a certain location for your interview, and THEN your Global Entry card will be issued. So it takes a while – like a few months. If this is an interesting proposition to you, apply well in advance.

The cost (right now) is $100 per person, and you will have to pay for your child as well, so it was $300 for all of us, and it was well worth every penny. Our status as Trusted Travelers is valid for five years, so we’ll likely use this for at least a couple more international trips, and even if not, we get TSA pre-check along with it, so all domestic flights will be a little bit easier. Seriously worth it.

Booking tickets

Choose the family row when you book.

If you’re booking online, try to select the “family row,” which is the row right past a break in seating. In the diagram below, it would be row 9 (and maybe row 13, but I’d call the airline to verify). This row has more leg room than any other, which is sooo helpful when you’re up and down a million times with a little person. Also (on Aer Lingus anyway), the flight attendant station is right past row 4, so they’re right in front of you in case you need anything (and you’ll need stuff, believe it).

OR select seats with one in between.

If you can’t book the family row, there’s another trick you can try.

If you’re traveling with a partner in addition to your tot, and your plane configuration looks like the above, you could certainly choose a 2-seater (A&C or H&K); this way you know your kiddo won’t be bugging anyone next to you. But what I would do is try a tip I learned recently: select two seats in that middle section of 4-across, but not next to each other — so, in the above example, D&F or E&G. If you leave an empty seat in the middle, there’s a decent chance it will remain empty. It makes total sense: if I’m a solo traveler choosing my seat, I’ll pick a window or an aisle, definitely not a middle seat between two that are already booked.

Of course, if the flight books up completely, you’ll end up with someone in between you, but I would bet a WHOLE lot of money that they’d be willing to switch with one of you.

If the plan works out, you’ll get a free seat for the whole flight! So handy for plopping your kiddo down from time to time or as a spot to store all the kid stuff you’re bringing along to maintain sanity. We got extremely lucky on both of our long-haul flights and ended up with an extra seat. It would have been a lot more crowded without it! Doable, but crowded. 🙂

Don’t stress too much about timing.

For our flight to Ireland, we flew first to Chicago, where we had a long layover during which I expected Luca to nap. Spoiler: he didn’t. We then flew from Chicago to Dublin overnight (we left Chicago around 5p and arrived in Dublin around midnight, which was 6a Irish time). The timing worked out fine because Luca slept some on the plane, and then a bunch while we were driving around Dublin, and then again at the hotel when we finally got to Galway.

Would I recommend this timing? Well, no – because I really don’t think it matters too much. On the return flight, we had an extremely different schedule, and again, Luca didn’t sleep when I expected him to, but he did sleep some on the flight and some during the next layover and some on the drive home from the airport.

Both schedules were fine. Of course, they involved screwed up sleep patterns and a lot of guessing, but that just comes with the territory of this type of trip. For domestic travel, I think the timing can make a huge difference, but when you’ll be traveling for 15+ hours, you’re going to be dealing with weird sleep patterns anyway. So don’t stress too much about getting a flight at the perfect time; you’ll likely be unable to, anyway! I think lots of international flights only happen once or twice per day, so you kind of have to roll with the punches. (If you haven’t noticed, this is the theme song of international travel!)

At the airport

Wear your baby, skip the radiation.

A huge perk to traveling with a toddler is that you can skip the x-ray machine and walk right through the metal detector instead. I *think* you might have to be wearing the kiddo, but I’m not positive, and Google isn’t super helpful on this matter. Either way, you’re bringing a wearable baby carrier (right?), and wearing the toddler is really the best way to keep eyes on him or her through security anyway. So pop that tot in, and you’re good to go. I also *think* that if your partner sticks close enough, he or she won’t have to go through the x-ray machine either, but don’t quote me on this one.

If you’re concerned about radiation (and when your husband is a scientist, you are concerned about radiation), this is a delightful alternative to the awkward airport pat-down you normally have to endure. They will still have you step aside so they can swab your hands to check for….chemicals or whatever. << My scientist husband will be so proud.

Bring your stroller all the way to the gate.

You can bring your stroller on the airplane for free, and you have the option either to check it at the counter with the rest of your luggage or bring it all the way to the gate and check it there. Choose option two! It’s an absolute necessity if you have to hoof it through the entire airport because your gate is literally the furthest one from security. (Does this happen to anyone else?! Every single time I fly!)

Also, if your kiddo wants to get out and walk around, you can then use the stroller as a free luggage cart. And even with the kid sitting in the seat, you can shove your diaper bag in the bottom and use the handles as a way to tote around the giant bag of snacks you’re bringing. 🙂

Note that some airlines won’t gate check large strollers. I don’t have details on which airlines, or what constitutes “large,” but you should be bringing a small-ish stroller anyway for international travel. We have the Chicco Liteway PLUS. I love and recommend it.

Get your ducks in a row and zip through security.

Lots of people hate seeing children at the airport. And I get it. Generally, kids are messy and chaotic and unpredictable – and they have big emotions. Not ideal for close quarters with tons of other people….like a security checkpoint, where there are also bags to contend with and liquids to take out and a bunch of things to keep track of all at once.

BUT! If you have your ducks in a row, you can get through security pretty quickly and easily, thereby giving the whole “flying with kids” thing a better name. Here’s what you do:

1. Before you ever leave for the airport, collect all your liquids in a TSA-approved plastic bag. Place this bag in an easily accessible location, like a non-zipping pocket of your purse or diaper bag. Think about anything else you’ll have to take out when you get there – a laptop, perhaps? Place these items in an easily accessible location also – bonus points if it’s the same one.
2. At the airport, before you enter the security line, strap on your wearable baby carrier and get the kiddo in and all straps adjusted. Your stroller should be empty of things underneath, but you can use it to tote bags to the front of the line.
3. When you’re at the front of the security line, empty your stroller of anything it’s carrying, then fold it up and place the stroller on the conveyor belt first. (This way, you can grab it on the other side and start putting your bags and stuff on as they come through.)
4. Grab however many bins you’ll need. Easily collect your liquids, laptop, and anything else that has to come out, and place it in the bins and on the conveyor belt.
5. Go through the metal detector while wearing baby and get your hands swabbed, then grab your stroller off the belt.
6. As your stuff comes through, grab it and throw it on the stroller, then proceed to a bench nearby to get reorganized.

Boom! You’re done. And even with a toddler along for the ride, you’ll be far from the most annoying passenger at security. Go, you!

A note on liquids

I *believe* you can bring as much liquid food (like squeeze pouches or jars of baby food) and water/pumped breastmilk/formula for your kiddo as you want. They’ll test the water to make sure it’s just water, but there aren’t the same 3oz limitations as for other liquids. However, testing the water does take a little bit of time, so if you want to be a speedy security rockstar, just bring your kid’s water bottle and fill it up at the airport. If you’re not bothered either way, feel free to bring water from home!

For the flight

Come prepared with more food than you think you need.

This one is a no-brainer and I think most parents will be saying, “duh,” but honestly. Pack what you think you’ll need, then double it. You’ve got a LONG flight ahead of you, and although you’ll likely get at least two meals on the plane, what if your toddler won’t eat anything from either of them?

Hanger + the stress of flying = no good.

Plus you’ll be dealing with a huge time change, and I’ve found that when circadian rhythms are thrown off, small tummies get super confused (actually, big tummies do, too). AND if your flight is delayed or you find yourself stuck at the airport for some reason or you find out the restaurant you’re going to is closed, or or or or or….you’ll be happy you have extra food.

Please note that I’m saying food and not just snacks. It’s absolutely fine and good to have snack-type items (see below for the ones I recommend), but make sure you have more substantial stuff too for when serious hunger strikes. I’d recommend making or grabbing a sandwich or two from the airport before you take off.

Practice changing your child on your lap.

That airplane bathroom is teeeeeny tiny. They do have a changing table pull-down thing, but it’s really sized for newborns, not for the toddler crowd. I’d advise you to practice changing your kiddo on your lap several times before you do it on the plane (this way, the babe gets used to it too). You can also try to master the standing-up diaper change (only works for pee diapers, not poopy ones unless you want a real Code Brown on your hands, literally).

Bonus: the ability to change your kid in a tiny space will come in handy all around the world! Most places I’ve traveled to don’t have enormous American bathrooms with ten stalls and a separate changing area. So you’ll need to hone this skill anyway.

Ask for lots and lots of water.

Bring a water bottle for your kiddo (we love these ones) and ask the flight attendants to fill it up – and up and up and up. (If you’re shy about asking for help [raises hand], they’re usually happy to fill it up if you walk to their station yourself, instead of having them come to you every time. If you’re a cooler person than I am and not worried about being annoying, do your thing!) Airplane travel is very dehydrating, and little bodies can be super sensitive to this change. Make sure your child is drinking as much as possible. If you’re still nursing (go mama!), that’s great too, but still get water in your little one; some research shows that the body treats breastmilk more like food in terms of hydration. Oh, and you need to drink up too! Keeping yourself hydrated is super important to make sure you’re alert when you arrive at your destination. (Also airplanes are seriously gross, and mega hydration can help you flush out anything you happen to pick up on the plane.)

Snacks I Recommend

• Raisins – These are good for little ears during takeoff and landing, the same way we adults chew gum. (If you’re nursing, this is a good time to do that, too.) Some people do lollipops, so if that’s your thing, go crazy. Really anything that gets the jaw working.
• Larabars, fig bars, or granola bars of choice
• Peanut butter packets – I love to pair peanut butter with fruit to bulk it up a little and prevent a blood sugar spike and then crash. The packets are super convenient; I’ve even been known to suck down a packet by itself because I’m 100% class.
• Fruit – Anything self-contained and non-juicy is good. Bananas, apples, pears, etc.
• Chocolate peanut butter cups – I recently started bringing these on trips, and it’s SO nice to have a sweet treat in the middle of a really l o n g day.
• Peanut butter crackers
• Plain pasta – cook this at home beforehand, obv. I just recently heard of this, but I’ll totally do it on our next trip. Cheap, easy, clean, and our boy hoovers carbs like there’s no tomorrow. (Apple doesn’t fall far!)

Toys and Activities I Recommend

1. Indestructible books – These are made from….I don’t know what, but some kind of reinforced paper. (I looked it up: it’s a synthetic material made from flashspun high-density polyethylene fibers.) They are SUPER lightweight and perfect for travel. Some of them have stories; some are just pictures and you can make up your own story to go along.
2. Ultimate Sticker Book – You can get these in any theme your child is obsessed with. We got the Puppy one, and when Luca saw it, he grinned hugely and went, “gog gog gog gog gog gog gog gog gog.” Success! 🙂
3. Tegu magnetic blocks – A gift from my sister-in-law, these blocks were brilliant for traveling! They’re magnetic. Is that enough said? Yes.
4. Window gel clings – Linking from Amazon just to show you what I mean, but don’t buy these ones! They often have them at Target – in the dollar spot or in the scrapbooking section – for far cheaper.
5. Water reveal pad – The BEST invention for travel ever. Luca was obsessed with this thing and it took up several solid 20-minute chunks. Praised be. The ONLY way this could be improved is if they made the pen in a hexagonal shape rather than cylindrical. It rolls! So you’ve got to keep an eye on it. Otherwise, perfect.
6. Lacing beads – Kids love these! If you want to save a buck, you can also simulate this activity with yarn and Cheerios. Cheap! Easy! Lightweight! Yes!

After you land

Don’t give in to jet lag.

It’s really hard to fight jet lag when you’re already exhausted from an unbelievably long day of travel. I get it! But you’ve gotta do it, especially when you’re traveling with a toddler. Little kids have no concept of time change or why they are total zombies in the middle of the day and wide awake at night time. They need your tough love to help them rest at the right times and be awake at the right times. Otherwise, your whole trip will be thrown off and you won’t be able to enjoy yourselves the way you want to.

What works for me is giving myself permission to sleep for an hour (two at MAX) and then literally forcing myself out of bed. That is super hard by itself, but the hardest part is waking that kiddo up. Unfortunately, you just have to do it. It’s a small sacrifice in the beginning that will make everything much better in the end. But it’s hard, I know! You’re strong. Be strong.

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Okay, that covers it! I think. 🙂 Travel with a toddler is so unpredictable but so worth every single struggle. I really believe that the best thing you can do is prepare yourself as much as you can – and then prepare yourself to LET GO. Go with the flow and have confidence. Whatever your trip throws your way, I promise you can handle it. You’re a rockstar.

You can do this.

xo!